How is HSP’s anxiety connected to low energy levels?
Highly Sensitive People generally have lower energy levels than their less sensitive fellows. HSPs tend to live on bursts of energy and flow on it depending on how far it gets them.
Think of it as surfing.
Here’s the catch. All of us were conditioned to live in a bit of crazy times, where the pace of the world is far stretched from human natural levels. Sensitive or not.
Everyone wants you to:
Decide now,
Move faster,
Work more, and more effectively,
Take fewer breaks and rest less, because “time is money”.
And because of it, HSPs feel far more pressured by the need to push beyond what they’re comfortable with. They no longer flow with their natural levels and go against themselves.
That’s because, on one hand, their original energy is lower, so to keep up with the demand they often use their will rather than energy.
On the other hand, their heightened sensitivity to the environment amplifies their reaction to every disappointment and expectation from others, causing them to react strongly. Consequently, they internalise these pressures and the fear drives them to work harder and do more. To avoid this discomfort, they tend to prioritise meeting external expectations. In addition, stress further depletes their energy.
Naturally, they now have double pressure, from the outside and from within telling them that they are not fast or good enough.
But the opposite is true!
In my view, sensitives are by far the most conscientious, diligent, and responsible people. Unfortunately, they are also the most stressed, anxious, and exhausted, trying to prove their worth.
I used to dream that I could change people and make others appreciate me. But we can't change what people think, feel, or believe. So, when I accepted this, it reflected on my anxiety and energy levels...
No matter how much you give, there is no guarantee that people will be satisfied. And this fact forces you to focus on the internal world and find ways to march to the beat of your own drum. This is where all peace and confidence lies.
What do I mean by this?
Everyone has their own needs, ideas, timelines, limits, their desires and preferences. I call it a subjective truth, perspective, or personal reality. Each of us is different. You and I, both being sensitive and sharing some values, will also have differences. It is your right and responsibility to honour and prioritise your own reality and let others take care of theirs.
Even though we share this wild external world, the first step to both releasing anxiety and exhaustion is to realise when we are prioritising the external perspective, vs when we live on our own.
As it happens, you will discover that a lot of the things that you feel pressured to do, or the pace of doing things, have more to do with your choices than it seems.
It's always a popular topic among sensitive individuals to talk about setting boundaries with others. You may have tried saying NO to others and discovered that it's not always simple. The most important but often overlooked aspect of this is that you need to establish boundaries for yourself first (I talk about it it in depth my Calm & Confident pDF & email series when you subscribe to my newsletter).
Try these new ways and come up with your own:
You won't have to feel resentful and torn about your friend calling you all the time with their emotional problems if you don’t always offer for them to open up or ask about how they feel.
You won’t get anxious and exhausted always solving household problems and paying bills if you suggest from a get-go to split responsibility.
To prevent a colleague or a manager from dumping extra projects on your desk, ask them which one they want you to put on hold, each time they ask for a new thing.
When you’ve done it for a while, you will see that you naturally get more confident and feel more liberated from doing extra things. The separation of responsibility becomes clearer when you only focus on what you want to do and communicate it clearly. The goal is not to get to the point where you’re resentful or hurt.
The only way to release this need to control everything was to trust. Trust that you are enough, that you’re doing enough, and that you know enough. If you don’t trust yourself, it will be easy for everyone to pressure you to stress and exhaust yourself.
All these methods are best practised when you can feel your body and can recognise what you feel like you can do or not. That’s because like I said in the beginning, sometimes we have more energy than even a few hours later, and we don’t always have to say NO to the same thing. Being in tune with your body and energy always gives you the right direction to pursue your timeline, your desire and your limitations. We can surf the waves, and feel connected to the highs and lows.
HSPs rely heavily on their thoughts because they want to avoid overwhelm. But our minds are strongly conditioned by all the voices we memorised throughout our lifetime. Our bodies give us far more authentic feedback, communicating truthfully on a moment-to-moment basis.
That’s why whenever you’re anxious it’s best to connect with the body first and get out of stress and the default, conditioned scenario.
Want to learn how to reconnect to your inner abilities and find that source of stability and home within?
Start by downloading the Free “Calm & Confident. Overwhelm & Stress Relief Toolkit for Highly Sensitive People. ” or email Gosia if you have any questions about your customised journey.
